“No one seems to slander deadbeat moms on Mother’s Day…” ~ unknown

Posted: July 2, 2013 in children, Divorce, Life
Tags: , , , , ,

skeleton

Census figures show only 57 percent of moms required to pay child support (385,000 women out of a total of 674,000) actually give up some or all of the money they owe. That leaves some 289,000 “deadbeat” mothers out there, a fact that has barely been reported in the media. Conversely, 70 percent of dads required to pay, ACTUALLY pay. Why then is “deadbeat dad” such a popular term? Since the census bureau began looking into this subject, “miscreant mothers” became the term to describe the the female side of this coin. Why not use deadbeat mom? It’s not even funny. You can “google” images for dead beat moms and you still get deadbeat dad clips, cards and photos such as this one:

card

A new statistic recently released shows that only 7 percent of custodial mothers (she has custody) works an average of 44 hours per week earning an income to support the children. On the other hand, 25 percent Custodial fathers work 44 hours per week. Why do custodial fathers choose to work more when they should receive support form the non-custodial parent? While a large portion of the mothers receiving support still maintained employment, a good portion stayed at home and worked from home or had no employment at all and instead accepted government assistance to subsidize the child support. No instance was discovered where a father receiving child support and did not have gainful employment.

In general society’s view is that every man is a potential deadbeat dad and that there is no such thing as a miscreant mom. She is a fiction, obviously created by chauvinist pigs to demonize and vilify women and shift the blame from themselves. The stats don’t lie. Mom’s ordered to pay, refuse to do so at a much larger percentage than Dads. (Moms 57% pay it – Dads 70% pay it)

Now enforcement or lack thereof:

The percentage of women who are not prosecuted is alarming. I have heard of instances where the child support in arrears was nearly $30,000 and it was enforced by not allowing a mother to gain a passport to go to Mexico with a friend. Another where her driver’s license was suspended for $19,000 in arrears. REALLY? WHAT THE HELL? In our state, if a man is behind a month, he gets picked up by a local  deputy sheriff and gets to stay at the county bed and breakfast until he faces a Family Court Judge and the glares of his child’s mother. I know of a specific instance where a gentleman was called up and cussed out and threatened with court and jail because the check wasn’t received on the due date. That date happened to be a federal holiday and the mail obviously did run that day. Note: The check was received the following day when the mail was delivered.

I know I am fortunate enough to make a good income. I am very thankful for that. However, does that mean my children’s mother should have a free pass on providing support? Hell, she makes more than me. One payment in 13 months hardly shows any kind of willingness to “help with the kids.” I get it, the amount owed each month may seem like a lot of money to some, not enough to others, but any parent who is genuinely concerned with the well being of their children contributes SOMETHING. Well unless you consider the text messages in the middle of the night PROMISING you’ll go by the back the next day and send the money because you were so tied up at work, SOMETHING.  I’ll take that text message to the grocery store and see if I can get some grapes and bananas with it. I guess when you’re out at restaurants in South Beach when you finally call them every three nights at 9:00pm means your life is full.

Leaving everyone with this:

child sacrifices

Don’t be a selfish person.

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